Don’t run into traffic, kids.
A Pi Phi’s Take on Round Up Weekend
**note: Hey, Pi Phi anon, one of my co-contributors answered your question. Scroll down.
Here at What’s Blogged Here, Changes The Internet we like to think of ourselves as a higher sort of internet entity which simply documents the mix of absurd student behavior, beautiful artistry, rabid fandom and rich history of athletic dominance that makes up life as a UT-Austin student, but every now and then something hits our desk that is so trashy that we simply can’t ignore it.
This is one of those things. Hurray for Greek life.
Grace H of Pi Phi has been kind enough to share with us her views on Round Up Weekend. We’ve got the screenshot but we’ve transcribed the text below so you don’t have to strain your eyes. You tell ‘em…?
*note: and we are still not officially affiliated with ut-austin in any way. read the sidebar disclaimer, man.
Betches Love This: Round Up
We can practically smell the foam fornication and vomit already.
It’s finally here. The weekend we all have been waiting for. So trade in your polos for manks, rainbows for high socks and LET’S. FUCKING. RAGE. Besides the fact that you’re fucking ugly, this is the time of year when the discrepancy between GDI and Greek is the most apparent. If you don’t have a green bracelet on, you should probably just go kill yourself now.
…
NOTE: Girl who asked us what we were waiting in line for, you’re obviously the farthest thing from a betch. Go get your teeth fixed, rush next year, get AXiD and then MAYBE we’ll talk to you.
Forget the whole “it’s 5 o’clock somewhere” shit. It’s fucking Round Up. From approximately 5 pm on Thursday to waking up from your drunkin stuper on Sunday, you should be intoxicated. As long as any betch is coherent awake, she should have a drink in her hand. Did we just say hand? We meant mouth.
Any true betch would know that class is canceled on Friday. It’s a fucking national holiday. “Oh, Professor Daley, there’s a test on Monday? You must be mistaken. See, it’s ROUNDUP.”
Round Up: exceptions to real life:
1. It is the only acceptable time, WE REPEAT: the ONLY acceptable time to wear a fanny pack post 1995.
2. Crawfish broils: The second set of circumstances where you hear the phrase “suck the head until the eyes wiggle” from a fratstar.
3. Unless you are a true betch and own the entire Elizabeth and James Spring 2012 line and/or weigh less than 100 pounds (so pretty much, any true betch) you should NEVER wear neon. Except for raves. But that all changes for this wonderful weekend.
Oh high schoolers. AKA betches in training. You think you’re so cool for giving head to that fratstar in bottom left and nobody saw you? Fucking think again. Real betches know all. But don’t worry little betcheys, deem your Round Up unsuccessful unless you do something that will come back and bite you in the ass during rush.
But for those of us real betches who wasted $20 buying a T-Pain ticket (who are we kidding, we’re not going to remember it anyway…), we know how to fucking RAGE. Beer bongs, slip n’ slides and one-lens sunglasses GET AT US.
If you don’t wake up on Sunday with any unexplainable contusions or stitches then you obviously did not have a betch-worthy time. Fucking duh.
So betches, start your livers because it’s going to be the most amazing weekend you’ll never remember.
Texas College GOP Leader: Obama Assassination ‘Tempting’
Hours after Pennsylvania State Police arrested a 21-year-old Idaho man for allegedly firing a semi-automatic rifle at the White House, the top student official for the College Republicans at the University of Texas tweeted that the idea of assassinating President Obama was “tempting.”
At 2:29 p.m. ET, UT’s Lauren E. Pierce wrote: “Y’all as tempting as it may be, don’t shoot Obama. We need him to go down in history as the WORST president we’ve EVER had! #2012.”
Pierce, the president of the College Republicans at UT Austin, told ABC News the comment was a “joke” and that the “whole [shooting incident] was stupid.” Giggling, she said that an attempted assassination would “only make the situation worse.”
“Insofar as she’s a representative [of the College Republicans], maybe it shouldn’t be said, but she’s made a positive statement in a way, ” said Cassie Wright, the group’s vice president.
“I don’t really see anything wrong with it,” Wright added. “It’s just a personal comment, not representative of any group. Just freedom of speech, you know?”
Source: abcnews.com
Q:I understand that you're under the impression that Grace H sent this email to Pi Phi however as a member of the exec board all emails to and from our list serv go through us and seeing how I'm the only one with access to the password, your post is completely fabricated. Regardless as to whether or not you believe it to be true, you are targeting 200 girls that have nothing to do with it and don't deserve the negative association. We ask that you please take it down before we take further action.
Anonymous
Thank you for bringing this to my attention. Here at What’s Blogged Here, Changes The Internet we take all claims of news falsification very seriously.
Unfortunately, since you are anonymous, I cannot respond to you in a more private forum and therefore cannot verify that you are indeed a Pi Phi exec board member (just like I cannot verify that this email is valid.) Validate this information to me, and I will remove the post.
Did Grace not send this to pi-phi-pc-08@googlegroups.com on Friday, March 23, 2012 8:43 AM? If that is indeed the case, I will immediately delete the post and all references to it.
Apologies for the inconvenience.
Stuff Longhorns Say
The absolute best video of KD's buzzer beater last night
Wow. Picture perfect. Catch and shoot, for a fadeaway three, over Dallas, for the win, then he goes to his mom.
He was only at UT for a year, but the Durantula is proof that what starts here truly changes the world.
Source: reddit.com
Source: jtotheizzoe
2500 BLOCK UNIVERSITY AVE
Criminal Trespass Warning: A UT Police Officer observed a non-UT subject walk up to the passenger door of his patrol vehicle and attempt to open it. The same subject then walked up to another patrol vehicle and again attempted to open the doors. The officers ran towards the subject and commanded him to step away from the vehicles. During the investigation, the subject informed the officers he was trying to gain entry into the patrol vehicles to make sure the officers had not been shot by an Asian Yakuza gang members tucked under the seat. The subject was issued a written Criminal Trespass Warning and was escorted from the area. Occurred on: 7-31-11, at 10:36 PM.
SAN JACINTO RESIDENCE HALL, 309 East 21st Street
Theft: A UT staff member reported an unknown subject absconded with a tube of Crest Whitening toothpaste with Scope from the Cypress Bend Café. The subject was described as: Black male, 6’-01” and 195 pounds. Subject may have minty fresh breath at this time. Loss value: $4.39. Occurred on: 7-07-11, at 10:00 AM.
